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Relationship Counseling: Contacting high school crush
Dear Dr. Ellen: Back in high school (about 5yrs ago) I had this secret crush on a classmate. I thought he was the sexiest and sweetest guy I ever saw. However, every time I'd see him I would just freeze up. Once we saw each other at a skating ring and stared at each other for a long time, speechless. Another time I sent him a letter telling him how
handsome and how much I admired him. Later for his birthday, I sent him a card. He always wanted to know who his secret admirer was but I never had the guts to even talk to him. Now he is in the military and still single and I keep thinking about him even
though so much time has elapsed. He never had a girlfriend, as far as I know, because he was very shy around girls, and now I would like to send him an e-mail but I don't know what to say. It would be nice to know how he's doing. Would you be so kind to tell me what I should do because I want to talk to him so badly but just the thought, freezes me all over, even if it's just friendship. Thank you so much for any advice you can give me. - Karen
Dear Karen: Life is too short to have any regrets. You have written the perfect letter to him only you sent it to me. Send him an email that says exactly what you told me. It's the truth and it's from your heart. Even if he says he's seeing someone, at least he will know how you feel and he may contact you later if something changes. The only difference in
your email to him will be that you will use the word, "you" instead of the 3rd person. Here's what it should look like.
"Back in high school (about 5yrs ago) I had this secret crush on you. I thought you were the sexiest and sweetest guy I ever saw. However, every time I'd see you I would just freeze up. Once we saw each other at a skating ring and stared at each other for a long time, speechless. Another time I sent you a letter telling you how handsome you are and how much I admired you. Later for your birthday, I sent you a card. I know you always wanted to know who your secret admirer was but I never had the guts to even talk to you. Someone told me that you are now in the military and still single and I still keep thinking about you even though so much time has elapsed. I'm not sure whether you have a girlfriend now. I finally got the guts to send you an e-mail. It would be nice to know how you are doing."
Feel the fear and do it anyway. Push the send button and you are done. He will definitely respond. Trust me, flattery will get you everywhere. - Dr. Ellen
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