Dear Dr. Ellen: My husband will buy expensive jewelry for his 15 year old daughter and I am wearing $3.99 earrings! I never ask for things, only what I need. I really resent that he gives her white gold earrings and chains over $100 just because that's what she asks for. We recently spent $30,000 for her to go to a boot camp to straighten her out. So why the expensive gifts too? I know he is good to my kids but they don't ask for things as much and I sure don't either. If I do need something I will either find it on sale or go without it. Now my husband is wanting to take all of us on a cruise and mentioned duty free jewelry. On our honeymoon he didn't buy me anything but yet he is planning on buying jewelry for her. I am so angry and don't know how to handle this. - Beth

Dear Beth: The Beatles said, "Money can't buy you love." Your husband thinks that the more expensive the gift, the more his daughter will love him. Of course, he is absolutely wrong. No matter how much money he gives her or how expensive the gifts, it isn't going to make her love him more or less. I know that you are hurting but so is your husband, especially since his daughter is having behavior problems. I'm sure he feels guilty knowing that in some way he has contributed to her problems. I know that if one of your children needed help, you would be there for them as well and get them into a program that promised to help them. I have a feeling that your husband would support that as well. It sounds like you married a very kind and loving man and please don't let his daughter ruin what the two of you have. He's secure in your love as he should be. He doesn't know what to do, so he's spending money. It isn't going to change anything, but it's a journey he'll have to go on to find that out. Keep loving and admiring him for the good you see in him. You already know what he needs to find out, that money can't buy happiness and it certainly doesn't buy love. Spending more quality time alone with his daughter is what she wants and needs. I'm sure that his daughter is jealous because he married you and he is with your children more than he is with her. I would, if I were you, gently encourage your husband to spend more time with his daughter by doing things that don't cost very much. Tell him to spend the money on special outings they can share together, rather than gifts. Instead of you being jealous, you need to realize that the better his relationship is with his daughter, the better he'll be as a husband and step dad. - Dr. Ellen